10.09.2012

Fifteen Shades of Real Life

With no disrespect to E. L. James (she is a writer, after all), I offer a few rational footnotes to her Fifty Shades series, lest we women get completely seduced by the clearly disturbed Mr. Grey.  

1. Every female college student should be wary of becoming involved with anyone five years older.

2.  Sex and erotica are enticing, but they're not love.

3.  Any woman who is tempted by a relationship that involves being beaten with a belt needs a friend to repeatedly scream in her face that she was created for better things.   

4.  For all the gains of the women's movement, women are still tolerating sub par relationships.  We need to knock it off!

5. Girls, we cannot obtain our self-worth from a man.  God gave us intrinsic, inalienable value the day we were born.  It's up to us not to misplace it. 

6.  Love is about service and sacrifice.  It is never about power (sexual or otherwise.)

7.  The only entity we should "submit" to is God. 

8.  A truly good man will not want to tie you up, or tie you down.

9.  A truly good man will propose.

10.  It's OK to wait for a truly good man.

11. If you invest in your appearance more than you invest in your mind, you are giving men permission to focus on your body more than your ideas.

12.  Men and women are different.  This is not a weakness, a mistake, or automatic grounds for resentment, distrust, or competition.  It's our first introduction to diversity.    

13. No one can "complete" you, but yourself.

14.  There is no Knight in Shining Armor.  Just imperfect fellas who are doing the best they can to impress the imperfect women that we are. 

15.  Fifty years of marriage is a better goal.





36 comments:

Brenda said...

I haven't read the book, nor to I ever intend to. I have heard so much about it through FB and blogs though. I love your take on it. We're more than half way to our 50 year goal...and beyond!

Joyce said...

Fabulous!

Rebecca Jo said...

I never read 'the books' but I like this list :)

Lynn Proctor said...

amen sister--this was great--i think robyn knows this, but i am sharing this with her!!

Juli said...

13. No one can "complete" you, but yourself.

And a good man will only make you better. :)

Rockin J's Footsteps said...

I didn't read the books but your list of the 15 is
a w e s o m e!!! Amen so true

Karen Lange said...

This is excellent, Mare! So glad you put this together. I've not read the book, nor do I plan to, but from what I've heard this is a good list in comparison. Thanks for speaking up for what love and commitment really mean. :)

Retired Knitter said...

Wow, what a great post. I have not read this book, but I have heard from various sources what it was about. It didn't appeal so I won't be reading it. But your list is worth reading. I plan on linking to you from my own blog.

ROBIN said...

I haven't read the book, but honestly, I wanted to just out of curiosity. I love your list.

Rita said...

Have not read the book, but from your list I don't think I would like it very much at all.

Jenny said...

Good list! I haven't read the books and won't. I feel like any type of porn - viewed or read - is not supposed to be part of our lives.
And I agree - how backward is it that we're supposed to be 'empowered' women, but then we are told that brutality against us is sexy and good? Insane! The same type of justification is used by/on behalf of strippers and I just don't buy it.

Ruth said...

I know so many women that read that book. Or all three. I don't care to read it. Or them.
Too many people have unrealistic ideas of relationships and the opposite sex. And they think they need somebody in their life. I really don't understand that.

Elisa {With Grace and Eve} said...

I haven't read the books but I love this! x

Marianne said...

Well said!

Julie Marie said...

love it. especially number #11!! so nice to meet you. thanks for stopping by my lil blog yesterday ;)

Lisa @ Two Bears Farm said...

50 years of marriage is a great goal!

Fran@Broken Cookies Don't Count said...

Great post, Mare! I am not inclined to read these books and I find the whole idea of them repulsive...and I'm not a prude! Excellent!

Jerralea said...

Kudos to you, Mare! If only all would listen ...

I really think 50 years of marriage is the best goal ever!

Gerri said...

Love this post! I am sharing it with my daughters. Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and leaving such nice comments. I promise to be a better blogging buddy in the future :)

Jo-Anne Meadows said...

Ok have never read the book have no interest in doing so but have to say this list is awesome and oh so true, really loved this post

Annmarie Pipa said...

women have bought what society tells us...we are equal in every way to men...so men get a free pass and women take birth control pills, and everyone seems happy with this. but we are not.
it is ok and it is right for women to have high expectations of men.

acommonsea said...

LOVE this!

~Lynn

Danielle L Zecher said...

I haven't read the books, either, and I'm not very interested in reading them. But, I do like your list. And I love the heart/ring picture!

Emmy said...

AMEN! Have not read the books myself and have no desire to.

kim said...

love this! didn't bother reading the book, but i wish i had had better since about "love" in my twenties.

Misha Gericke said...

Excellent list. I'm not really a fan of erotica, so I gave 50 Shades a skip.

I agree with you 100%, though. :-)

sparkle100-havealook.blogspot.com said...

I like how she mentions the 50 years.
Better Goal. YA!!!!!

Well Hubby and I made the 50th and this year was the 51.

How blessed we are.

Elana Johnson said...

All I can say is YES.

Jena said...

I haven't read the 50 shades thing either, but I do not intend to. Thanks for being a good influence on others in this area. That book sounds disturbing. and pornographic.

Joanne said...

I have no intentions in reading the book. As soon as I heard what it was about and a few details..I said "nope", not for me. I love your post! Every young lady should read it. Have a great day!
Blessings, Joanne

mare ball said...

Thanks for all the input. Ballpark readers are the best! A lighter topic next post....:-)

Sarah Mcdougal said...

Hi pretty lady! I nominated you for the Liebster Award! Check out what you have to do here:

http://www.enjoyingtheepiphany.com/2012/10/the-liebster-award.html

:-)

Tamera Brose said...

Wow, this was excellent.

Becca Acker said...

I've heard so many people saying about how much they liked this book, it honestly makes me sick in my stomach. And it was refreshing to hear you make these points. It's so sad to think women are buying into this. Would they really want such abuse in their own relationships?
50 years of marriage is awesome goal! I look forward to that with my man. :)

happygirl said...

This is a great list. I haven't read the book, and really have no desire to read it. Thanks for stopping by my blog. It was great to hear from you. :)

Shell said...

Amen!